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scurvyknaverySo, there's this ridiculous AU that ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
thrace_ and I cooked up. It starts here, with this flowchart that explains that Olivia is secretly into women, and maybe Astrid's dating a girl named Jenny. And maybe Olivia starts dating Agent Blake Lively, this flirty CIA agent that she works a case with in Prague. Maybe that fic is here.
This story sort of fits in with that canon, after Ladies of Cambridge, sometime between episodes 2.15 and 2.22.
Title: you can order eggs & toast
Fandom: Fringe
Pairing: Astrid/Jenny (Astrid/OFC)
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 2,721
Summary: Queer, domestic, curtain-y things that happen when Astrid leaves the lab at night.
Notes: This is all atthrace_'s request. Thanks to jengrrrl and fivewhatfive for beta reading.
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction - all events and actions are completely made up. Absolutely nothing in this story should be taken as fact. I am not, nor do I claim to be, the owner of the rights to any of the characters in this work. This original work of fan fiction is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License; attribution should include a link to this Livejournal post.
It starts around the time that Peter and Walter and Olivia fly off to Jacksonville. Astrid tries to keep herself busy - she offers to help the Massive Dynamic programmers with their calculations, and when they politely decline, she catches up on all the paperwork she'll have to do all month, and cleans the lab twice. On her way home, she stops at the market and buys three bags of apples.
Jenny comes home around the time that Astrid's rolling out pastry for her second pie. She takes one look at the bags of flour, the apples everywhere, and sighs. "Tough day at work?" she asks.
Astrid smiles. "Something like that."
She hears the sound of Jenny's bag and coat hitting the floor, and then Jenny is pressed against her from behind, arms wrapped tight around her waist. Astrid leans back against her, and lets herself take a moment to remember just how much she likes this. How much she likes having someone here to take care of her, after a long day of taking care of Walter and Peter and the fallout from the alternate universe.
"You alright?" Jenny asks, mouth pressed against her shoulder.
"Yeah." Astrid thinks about what happened that day, about the building in New York and how much she's allowed to discuss, then shakes her head. "I don't want to talk about it."
It's not the first time she's come home like this; upset about work and unable to talk about the reason. And she knows that every time it happens, Jenny wants to push her, just a little. She knows that Jenny doesn't like what the job's been doing to Astrid, since she started at Fringe Division. But tonight, Jenny doesn't get upset. She just pulls up a chair at the kitchen counter, across from Astrid, and starts talking about her day. Astrid peels apples, and lets herself get lost in stories about Jenny's thesis supervisor.
By the end of the night, Astrid's made three apple pies, an apple cake, and a cobbler, and she's pretty sure that, even if she lives in a world where buildings in New York spontaneously swap universes, she's going to be alright.
*
The next day is Saturday, and they spend the morning staying in, eating cobbler for breakfast. They're on the couch, the pan perched between them. Jenny's got her laptop balanced on her knees, and she's frowning at it while she catches up on papers she needs to grade. Astrid's own computer is sitting on the arm of the couch, and theoretically she's skimming headlines on Slashdot, but really, she's hardly paying attention. Mostly, she's staring at the articles with one eye and watching Jenny with the other, enjoying the way her hair won't quite stay pulled back into a ponytail.
Jenny leans down, reaching for another spoonful of cobbler, and catches Astrid watching. "What?"
"Nothing," Astrid says, smiling. "You just look cute like that."
"Like what?" she says, then bats her eyelashes outrageously.
Astrid can't help it, she laughs. "Like that."
Jenny leans over the pan of cobbler, and Astrid meets her halfway for a kiss.
"Hey," Astrid says. "Have you ever thought about having a family?"
Jenny's eyes go wide. Astrid's eyes almost match. She doesn't know where it came from. But now that she's said it, she thinks about what she's learned about the world since working for Fringe Division, and all the ways that life is short and fragile and dangerous, and realizes that she really means it.
Three weeks later, they've settled on getting a dog.
*
They can't agree on what kind of dog they want, and after a week of Astrid campaigning for a golden retriever and Jenny pointedly emailing her pictures of beagles, they settle on a mutt from the MSPCA. They spend an entire day driving between shelters, trying to decide, and it's the most fun Astrid's had in weeks.
The weekend before they end up deciding for good, Astrid drags Olivia to one of the shelters, to help her choose. Olivia spends half the ride there with her hands jammed into her sweatshirt pockets, asking why Jenny isn't the one helping Astrid with this.
Astrid sighs. "Because, Jenny and I were already here last weekend, and we narrowed it down to three. We need a neutral party to help us."
Olivia looks at her, pointedly. It's politer than what Astrid really means - that she's noticed the way Olivia won't look at Walter unless she has to, and the dark circles beneath her eyes. Olivia runs a hand through her hair, and sighs. "Alright."
"Good," Astrid says, eyes on the road, sneaking glances at Olivia as often as she can. "And you like dogs, right?"
Olivia nods, making a face that somehow reminds Astrid of Charlie. "Yeah. Yeah, I do."
Astrid smiles. "It's settled, then. And, hey, if we get a dog that gets along with you, Ella's always welcome to visit him whenever she wants."
Olivia does something with her face that's about six expressions at once, before she finally lands on a tentative smile. "I think Ella would really like that."
*
They name the puppy Duke.
He's thirty pounds of barking, sniffing enthusiasm, and when they arrive at the shelter and put him on his leash to take him home, his tail starts wagging so hard that it moves his entire back half from side to side. He's big enough that he can come along on Astrid's morning jogs - or at least, he will be, if the size of his paws are any indication - but friendly enough that Jenny warmed up to him almost instantly. And now he's theirs, to keep.
It's a little daunting, but it's also pretty exciting.
That first night, it's dark and wet and rainy, and Duke spends half the night whimpering outside their bedroom door. In the end, it's Jenny - even though she insisted right from the start that if they got a dog, it'd be sleeping in the kitchen - who gets out of bed and lets him in.
He spends the rest of the night sound asleep, sprawled across their legs.
*
About a month after that, Peter leaves, and suddenly those difficult days at work get a lot harder.
It's after one of these - a long case, little kids getting turned into frogs and Walter completely inconsolable without Peter - that Astrid drags Olivia back to her apartment, straight from the lab. There's not any real reason for it, except that Peter's gone and neither of them can stand the idea of watching Walter slowly smoke himself into a stupor one more time.
(Not without Peter there, gently cracking jokes to soften the effect of him.)
So at the end of the day, Astrid turns to Olivia in the parking lot, nods toward the passenger seat of her car, and says, "Get in."
Olivia opens the door with a sigh, like she's been waiting for Astrid to ask.
She tries to text Jenny on the way home, to let her know that Olivia will be coming by. But she must have forgotten to check her phone (she never checks her phone, after she gets home from school), because when Olivia and Astrid walk into the apartment, Jenny pauses and blinks a little, surprised at the extra guest.
She gets up from the kitchen table to give Astrid her kiss hello, like always. And then she steps beyond her to Olivia, standing awkwardly in the doorway, and gives her a hug, too, without a word of protest. Astrid's suddenly overwhelmed, right at that moment, with how lucky she is to have someone like Jenny around.
It's about then that Duke skids across the apartment, wagging his tail and positively desperate to sniff Olivia's shoes and have her scratch his ears. Olivia actually smiles at him, and crouches down to ruffle his fur and let him wash her face. Astrid gets herself a beer, and another for Olivia, and Jenny figures out a way to turn dinner for two into dinner for three, even though Olivia swears up and down that she's not hungry. They sit together at the kitchen table, Duke at their feet, not talking about the FBI or anyone with the last name Bishop. It's wonderful.
After they've eaten, Astrid offers to take the dog out for a walk, and Olivia comes with her.
The sun's already set, and so they walk shoulder to shoulder in the dark, not speaking. Each thinking their own thoughts as Duke runs laps around them, beside himself with excitement over going to the park. Every so often, Olivia bends down to scratch him behind the ears, and the look he gives her is so adoring, that Astrid can't help but smile.
At the park, Astrid pulls a tennis ball out of her pocket, and throws it for Duke over and over again. She and Olivia watch, still quiet, as he chases after it like it's the most important thing in the whole world, and (mostly) brings it back for another try. After a while, she passes the ball to Olivia, who takes it with a smile. She throws it some more, farther than Astrid can, and Duke chases after it with just as much interest.
By the time they decide it's time to leave, Duke is worn out and stumbling over his own feet, tongue hanging out of the side of his mouth. Astrid reaches down to grab Duke's collar and clip on his leash, when Olivia coughs.
"Do you think he's really gone?" Olivia says, suddenly. She doesn't mean the dog.
It's the first thing either of them have said since they left the apartment. Olivia sounds so small, so frightened, that Astrid has to grip the leash until her knuckles turn pale, holding back from pulling Olivia into a hug. She's pretty sure Olivia would feel like it was crossing a line, even if she needed it.
"I hope not," Astrid says. She doesn't need to explain the reasons why.
"Me too," Olivia says. Then, "Thanks for inviting me to dinner."
"Hey," she says, nudging Olivia's shoulder. Olivia leans against her, pressing close for a moment. "You're always welcome."
"Thanks," Olivia says. It's comfortable, friendly, and Astrid's suddenly really glad that she invited her along.
They walk home in companionable quiet, listening to Duke panting the whole way back.
*
Later that night, well after Olivia has gone, Astrid crawls into bed. Jenny's already there, half-asleep, and as Astrid slides under the covers, Jenny curls around her body, settling with her head pillowed on Astrid's shoulder.
"So," she says. "Not that I mind, but do you want to tell me about the surprise visit from Olivia tonight?
"We had a rough day at work today."
The more she uses that phrase, the less it seems to mean.
"You've been having a lot of those, lately," Jenny says, more concerned than suspicious.
"I know," Astrid says. Somehow, when Jenny points it out, it's harder to ignore the weight of what she actually does at work, these days.
"You doing alright?"
"Yeah," Astrid says, kissing the top of Jenny's head. "I'm going to be."
She still doesn't know whether she wants to tell Jenny everything, or protect her from ever knowing about any of it.
*
Two weeks later, Olivia shows up at Astrid's apartment with a favor in her eyes. Ella's in the car, and would Astrid mind, and she knows it's a weekend but Rachel's still out of town and she needs to follow up on a lead and Walter's - well, Walter.
Astrid just nods, and tells Olivia she'd be happy to help out.
It takes Duke about ten seconds to decide that Ella is his new favorite person. Ella takes to him just as quickly, despite the fact that Duke is almost as big as she is. "Is it okay if I pet him?" Ella says, looking up at Astrid with wide, hopeful eyes.
"Of course," Astrid says, trying to hold back a laugh.
Ella spends a solid hour with Duke on the living room floor, playing with his favorite rubber newspaper, while Jenny and Astrid watch from the couch. Every so often, Jenny nudges Astrid's knee and smiles, and Astrid lets herself think about what it would be like to have a daughter.
*
After that first weekend, they start watching Ella more and more. Rachel's out of town for a few weeks, tying up loose ends with Greg, and Olivia's been pushing herself harder and harder, looking for Peter. Honestly, looking at the way Walter's been coping, Astrid doesn't blame her.
The second time Olivia drops her off, she gives Astrid a crooked smile over Ella's head. "She asked if she could come stay with you for the day," she says, sounding bashful. "She likes your dog."
Astrid grins. "Fortunately, the dog likes her just as much."
By fourth time Olivia picks Ella up, thanking the two of them profusely and promising to make it up to them somehow, Jenny's started to worry. Astrid doesn't blame her - she understands what's happening, and she's still worried.
"Not that I'm complaining," Jenny says, after Ella's finally said goodbye to Duke, and let Olivia take her home. "Seeing Ella is lovely, but - something's going on."
Astrid sits down on the couch with a sigh. "It's kind of a long story," she starts. Jenny sits down beside her, wrapping an arm around Astrid's waist and squeezing. "Peter left."
Jenny frowns. "He left the FBI?"
"No, he left town. And Walter is - Walter, and Olivia's trying to fix everything, because she's taking all of this like it's her fault, and some days it's either babysitting Ella, or babysitting Walter while he tries to calculate the number of atoms in his milkshake and stares at his own feet."
Jenny just stares, obviously caught off guard. Astrid brings her hand up to her lips, surprised at herself. "I'm sorry," Astrid says. "I'm sorry."
Slowly, Jenny's expression softens from surprise, to concern, to open affection. Jenny doesn't say anything, but does lean forward and press a kiss to the corner of Astrid's mouth.
"I should have told you sooner. I just - didn't know how to say it. And also I think some of it's classified."
Jenny makes a face, and kissses Astrid again. "Everything you do is classified," she says, teasing.
"This is even more classified than usual," Astrid says, trying to joke. It sounds hollow.
Jenny looks at her for a long while, clearly thinking. Astrid lets her, trying not to fidget while she waits. "Will you tell me?" Jenny finally says. "Next time, when something happens?"
"Yeah."
"You promise?" Jenny says, squeezing Astrid's waist tight.
"Of course I promise," Astrid says.
If she gets a little teary, Jenny doesn't mention it. She just keeps on holding her close.
*
The next week, Peter disappears to the other side, and Walter and Olivia disappear along after him, and Astrid's just left behind, alone. That day, she cleans the lab twice, top to bottom, brushes Gene until his coat shines, and re-alphabetizes all of Walter's carefully-labeled specimen jars.
On the way home, she stops at the market and buys three pounds of peaches. When she gets home, she starts right in on peeling them all, with Duke watching her warily from his favorite spot in front of the kitchen sink.
Jenny gets home just as Astrid's finishing with the last of the peaches. She stands in the doorway for a moment, watching Astrid's hands with the paring knife, quick and a little nervous. Slowly, she sets her things down and comes up behind Astrid, taking away the knife from her right hand and the peach from her left. Astrid turns in her arms, and one look at the concern on Jenny's face is all she can take. She makes this noise, somewhere between a snort and a sob, and hides her face in Jenny's shoulder.
"What's wrong, baby?" Jenny murmurs against Astrid's hair. "What's wrong?"
"I can't talk about it," Astrid whispers, blinking back tears. "But something awful's happened. I'm worried."
Jenny leads her over to the couch, and Duke rests his head in her lap, solid and a little slobbery. They all sit there for a moment, while Astrid finishes crying and catches her breath. Through it all, Jenny rubs her back and whispers it's okay, over and over again, until Astrid really believes her.
thrace_ and I cooked up. It starts here, with this flowchart that explains that Olivia is secretly into women, and maybe Astrid's dating a girl named Jenny. And maybe Olivia starts dating Agent Blake Lively, this flirty CIA agent that she works a case with in Prague. Maybe that fic is here.This story sort of fits in with that canon, after Ladies of Cambridge, sometime between episodes 2.15 and 2.22.
Title: you can order eggs & toast
Fandom: Fringe
Pairing: Astrid/Jenny (Astrid/OFC)
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 2,721
Summary: Queer, domestic, curtain-y things that happen when Astrid leaves the lab at night.
Notes: This is all at
thrace_'s request. Thanks to jengrrrl and fivewhatfive for beta reading. Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction - all events and actions are completely made up. Absolutely nothing in this story should be taken as fact. I am not, nor do I claim to be, the owner of the rights to any of the characters in this work. This original work of fan fiction is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License; attribution should include a link to this Livejournal post.
It starts around the time that Peter and Walter and Olivia fly off to Jacksonville. Astrid tries to keep herself busy - she offers to help the Massive Dynamic programmers with their calculations, and when they politely decline, she catches up on all the paperwork she'll have to do all month, and cleans the lab twice. On her way home, she stops at the market and buys three bags of apples.
Jenny comes home around the time that Astrid's rolling out pastry for her second pie. She takes one look at the bags of flour, the apples everywhere, and sighs. "Tough day at work?" she asks.
Astrid smiles. "Something like that."
She hears the sound of Jenny's bag and coat hitting the floor, and then Jenny is pressed against her from behind, arms wrapped tight around her waist. Astrid leans back against her, and lets herself take a moment to remember just how much she likes this. How much she likes having someone here to take care of her, after a long day of taking care of Walter and Peter and the fallout from the alternate universe.
"You alright?" Jenny asks, mouth pressed against her shoulder.
"Yeah." Astrid thinks about what happened that day, about the building in New York and how much she's allowed to discuss, then shakes her head. "I don't want to talk about it."
It's not the first time she's come home like this; upset about work and unable to talk about the reason. And she knows that every time it happens, Jenny wants to push her, just a little. She knows that Jenny doesn't like what the job's been doing to Astrid, since she started at Fringe Division. But tonight, Jenny doesn't get upset. She just pulls up a chair at the kitchen counter, across from Astrid, and starts talking about her day. Astrid peels apples, and lets herself get lost in stories about Jenny's thesis supervisor.
By the end of the night, Astrid's made three apple pies, an apple cake, and a cobbler, and she's pretty sure that, even if she lives in a world where buildings in New York spontaneously swap universes, she's going to be alright.
*
The next day is Saturday, and they spend the morning staying in, eating cobbler for breakfast. They're on the couch, the pan perched between them. Jenny's got her laptop balanced on her knees, and she's frowning at it while she catches up on papers she needs to grade. Astrid's own computer is sitting on the arm of the couch, and theoretically she's skimming headlines on Slashdot, but really, she's hardly paying attention. Mostly, she's staring at the articles with one eye and watching Jenny with the other, enjoying the way her hair won't quite stay pulled back into a ponytail.
Jenny leans down, reaching for another spoonful of cobbler, and catches Astrid watching. "What?"
"Nothing," Astrid says, smiling. "You just look cute like that."
"Like what?" she says, then bats her eyelashes outrageously.
Astrid can't help it, she laughs. "Like that."
Jenny leans over the pan of cobbler, and Astrid meets her halfway for a kiss.
"Hey," Astrid says. "Have you ever thought about having a family?"
Jenny's eyes go wide. Astrid's eyes almost match. She doesn't know where it came from. But now that she's said it, she thinks about what she's learned about the world since working for Fringe Division, and all the ways that life is short and fragile and dangerous, and realizes that she really means it.
Three weeks later, they've settled on getting a dog.
*
They can't agree on what kind of dog they want, and after a week of Astrid campaigning for a golden retriever and Jenny pointedly emailing her pictures of beagles, they settle on a mutt from the MSPCA. They spend an entire day driving between shelters, trying to decide, and it's the most fun Astrid's had in weeks.
The weekend before they end up deciding for good, Astrid drags Olivia to one of the shelters, to help her choose. Olivia spends half the ride there with her hands jammed into her sweatshirt pockets, asking why Jenny isn't the one helping Astrid with this.
Astrid sighs. "Because, Jenny and I were already here last weekend, and we narrowed it down to three. We need a neutral party to help us."
Olivia looks at her, pointedly. It's politer than what Astrid really means - that she's noticed the way Olivia won't look at Walter unless she has to, and the dark circles beneath her eyes. Olivia runs a hand through her hair, and sighs. "Alright."
"Good," Astrid says, eyes on the road, sneaking glances at Olivia as often as she can. "And you like dogs, right?"
Olivia nods, making a face that somehow reminds Astrid of Charlie. "Yeah. Yeah, I do."
Astrid smiles. "It's settled, then. And, hey, if we get a dog that gets along with you, Ella's always welcome to visit him whenever she wants."
Olivia does something with her face that's about six expressions at once, before she finally lands on a tentative smile. "I think Ella would really like that."
*
They name the puppy Duke.
He's thirty pounds of barking, sniffing enthusiasm, and when they arrive at the shelter and put him on his leash to take him home, his tail starts wagging so hard that it moves his entire back half from side to side. He's big enough that he can come along on Astrid's morning jogs - or at least, he will be, if the size of his paws are any indication - but friendly enough that Jenny warmed up to him almost instantly. And now he's theirs, to keep.
It's a little daunting, but it's also pretty exciting.
That first night, it's dark and wet and rainy, and Duke spends half the night whimpering outside their bedroom door. In the end, it's Jenny - even though she insisted right from the start that if they got a dog, it'd be sleeping in the kitchen - who gets out of bed and lets him in.
He spends the rest of the night sound asleep, sprawled across their legs.
*
About a month after that, Peter leaves, and suddenly those difficult days at work get a lot harder.
It's after one of these - a long case, little kids getting turned into frogs and Walter completely inconsolable without Peter - that Astrid drags Olivia back to her apartment, straight from the lab. There's not any real reason for it, except that Peter's gone and neither of them can stand the idea of watching Walter slowly smoke himself into a stupor one more time.
(Not without Peter there, gently cracking jokes to soften the effect of him.)
So at the end of the day, Astrid turns to Olivia in the parking lot, nods toward the passenger seat of her car, and says, "Get in."
Olivia opens the door with a sigh, like she's been waiting for Astrid to ask.
She tries to text Jenny on the way home, to let her know that Olivia will be coming by. But she must have forgotten to check her phone (she never checks her phone, after she gets home from school), because when Olivia and Astrid walk into the apartment, Jenny pauses and blinks a little, surprised at the extra guest.
She gets up from the kitchen table to give Astrid her kiss hello, like always. And then she steps beyond her to Olivia, standing awkwardly in the doorway, and gives her a hug, too, without a word of protest. Astrid's suddenly overwhelmed, right at that moment, with how lucky she is to have someone like Jenny around.
It's about then that Duke skids across the apartment, wagging his tail and positively desperate to sniff Olivia's shoes and have her scratch his ears. Olivia actually smiles at him, and crouches down to ruffle his fur and let him wash her face. Astrid gets herself a beer, and another for Olivia, and Jenny figures out a way to turn dinner for two into dinner for three, even though Olivia swears up and down that she's not hungry. They sit together at the kitchen table, Duke at their feet, not talking about the FBI or anyone with the last name Bishop. It's wonderful.
After they've eaten, Astrid offers to take the dog out for a walk, and Olivia comes with her.
The sun's already set, and so they walk shoulder to shoulder in the dark, not speaking. Each thinking their own thoughts as Duke runs laps around them, beside himself with excitement over going to the park. Every so often, Olivia bends down to scratch him behind the ears, and the look he gives her is so adoring, that Astrid can't help but smile.
At the park, Astrid pulls a tennis ball out of her pocket, and throws it for Duke over and over again. She and Olivia watch, still quiet, as he chases after it like it's the most important thing in the whole world, and (mostly) brings it back for another try. After a while, she passes the ball to Olivia, who takes it with a smile. She throws it some more, farther than Astrid can, and Duke chases after it with just as much interest.
By the time they decide it's time to leave, Duke is worn out and stumbling over his own feet, tongue hanging out of the side of his mouth. Astrid reaches down to grab Duke's collar and clip on his leash, when Olivia coughs.
"Do you think he's really gone?" Olivia says, suddenly. She doesn't mean the dog.
It's the first thing either of them have said since they left the apartment. Olivia sounds so small, so frightened, that Astrid has to grip the leash until her knuckles turn pale, holding back from pulling Olivia into a hug. She's pretty sure Olivia would feel like it was crossing a line, even if she needed it.
"I hope not," Astrid says. She doesn't need to explain the reasons why.
"Me too," Olivia says. Then, "Thanks for inviting me to dinner."
"Hey," she says, nudging Olivia's shoulder. Olivia leans against her, pressing close for a moment. "You're always welcome."
"Thanks," Olivia says. It's comfortable, friendly, and Astrid's suddenly really glad that she invited her along.
They walk home in companionable quiet, listening to Duke panting the whole way back.
*
Later that night, well after Olivia has gone, Astrid crawls into bed. Jenny's already there, half-asleep, and as Astrid slides under the covers, Jenny curls around her body, settling with her head pillowed on Astrid's shoulder.
"So," she says. "Not that I mind, but do you want to tell me about the surprise visit from Olivia tonight?
"We had a rough day at work today."
The more she uses that phrase, the less it seems to mean.
"You've been having a lot of those, lately," Jenny says, more concerned than suspicious.
"I know," Astrid says. Somehow, when Jenny points it out, it's harder to ignore the weight of what she actually does at work, these days.
"You doing alright?"
"Yeah," Astrid says, kissing the top of Jenny's head. "I'm going to be."
She still doesn't know whether she wants to tell Jenny everything, or protect her from ever knowing about any of it.
*
Two weeks later, Olivia shows up at Astrid's apartment with a favor in her eyes. Ella's in the car, and would Astrid mind, and she knows it's a weekend but Rachel's still out of town and she needs to follow up on a lead and Walter's - well, Walter.
Astrid just nods, and tells Olivia she'd be happy to help out.
It takes Duke about ten seconds to decide that Ella is his new favorite person. Ella takes to him just as quickly, despite the fact that Duke is almost as big as she is. "Is it okay if I pet him?" Ella says, looking up at Astrid with wide, hopeful eyes.
"Of course," Astrid says, trying to hold back a laugh.
Ella spends a solid hour with Duke on the living room floor, playing with his favorite rubber newspaper, while Jenny and Astrid watch from the couch. Every so often, Jenny nudges Astrid's knee and smiles, and Astrid lets herself think about what it would be like to have a daughter.
*
After that first weekend, they start watching Ella more and more. Rachel's out of town for a few weeks, tying up loose ends with Greg, and Olivia's been pushing herself harder and harder, looking for Peter. Honestly, looking at the way Walter's been coping, Astrid doesn't blame her.
The second time Olivia drops her off, she gives Astrid a crooked smile over Ella's head. "She asked if she could come stay with you for the day," she says, sounding bashful. "She likes your dog."
Astrid grins. "Fortunately, the dog likes her just as much."
By fourth time Olivia picks Ella up, thanking the two of them profusely and promising to make it up to them somehow, Jenny's started to worry. Astrid doesn't blame her - she understands what's happening, and she's still worried.
"Not that I'm complaining," Jenny says, after Ella's finally said goodbye to Duke, and let Olivia take her home. "Seeing Ella is lovely, but - something's going on."
Astrid sits down on the couch with a sigh. "It's kind of a long story," she starts. Jenny sits down beside her, wrapping an arm around Astrid's waist and squeezing. "Peter left."
Jenny frowns. "He left the FBI?"
"No, he left town. And Walter is - Walter, and Olivia's trying to fix everything, because she's taking all of this like it's her fault, and some days it's either babysitting Ella, or babysitting Walter while he tries to calculate the number of atoms in his milkshake and stares at his own feet."
Jenny just stares, obviously caught off guard. Astrid brings her hand up to her lips, surprised at herself. "I'm sorry," Astrid says. "I'm sorry."
Slowly, Jenny's expression softens from surprise, to concern, to open affection. Jenny doesn't say anything, but does lean forward and press a kiss to the corner of Astrid's mouth.
"I should have told you sooner. I just - didn't know how to say it. And also I think some of it's classified."
Jenny makes a face, and kissses Astrid again. "Everything you do is classified," she says, teasing.
"This is even more classified than usual," Astrid says, trying to joke. It sounds hollow.
Jenny looks at her for a long while, clearly thinking. Astrid lets her, trying not to fidget while she waits. "Will you tell me?" Jenny finally says. "Next time, when something happens?"
"Yeah."
"You promise?" Jenny says, squeezing Astrid's waist tight.
"Of course I promise," Astrid says.
If she gets a little teary, Jenny doesn't mention it. She just keeps on holding her close.
*
The next week, Peter disappears to the other side, and Walter and Olivia disappear along after him, and Astrid's just left behind, alone. That day, she cleans the lab twice, top to bottom, brushes Gene until his coat shines, and re-alphabetizes all of Walter's carefully-labeled specimen jars.
On the way home, she stops at the market and buys three pounds of peaches. When she gets home, she starts right in on peeling them all, with Duke watching her warily from his favorite spot in front of the kitchen sink.
Jenny gets home just as Astrid's finishing with the last of the peaches. She stands in the doorway for a moment, watching Astrid's hands with the paring knife, quick and a little nervous. Slowly, she sets her things down and comes up behind Astrid, taking away the knife from her right hand and the peach from her left. Astrid turns in her arms, and one look at the concern on Jenny's face is all she can take. She makes this noise, somewhere between a snort and a sob, and hides her face in Jenny's shoulder.
"What's wrong, baby?" Jenny murmurs against Astrid's hair. "What's wrong?"
"I can't talk about it," Astrid whispers, blinking back tears. "But something awful's happened. I'm worried."
Jenny leads her over to the couch, and Duke rests his head in her lap, solid and a little slobbery. They all sit there for a moment, while Astrid finishes crying and catches her breath. Through it all, Jenny rubs her back and whispers it's okay, over and over again, until Astrid really believes her.